“Let me tell you this: if you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it’s not because they enjoy solitude. It’s because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.” ~ Jodi Picoult
Upon reading this quote, I felt a feeling of uneasiness as I wrestled with the reality of these words. Immediately, I was bombarded with the following questions: “Rosalynd, is this true for you?” “Why did you assume this identity?” “Did you develop the identity of a loner out of fear?” “What did you fear?” From a place of awareness, my higher-self responded, “Yes, you chose to be a loner out of fear of rejection.” I never thought about it, until I read this quote recently.
As far back as I can remember, I suffered rejection from those closest to me. Consequently, there were several periods throughout my life where I felt lonely and/or alone. I remember most of my life, shrinking in front of people (in various ways) just to fit in and make others feel comfortable. Always at the risk of rejecting my true identity. No wonder, I suffered a major identity crisis during my 20s and 30s. For so many years, I felt like a fish out of water. It wasn’t until my 30s, that I realized that I was swimming with the wrong fish. Thankfully, I am now in a place where I have learned how to reframe my thoughts and feelings regarding rejection. I have come to learn that people don’t reject me because of who I am, but rather, who they are. Hence, my mantra in this season of my life is “Other people’s opinions of me is not my business.” More importantly, I have discovered who I am and why I am here. This has made all the difference in the world in how I live my life and what I entertain. Continue reading