“There is no greatness without a passion to be great, whether it’s the aspiration of an athlete
or an artist, a scientist, a parent, or a businessperson.” ~ Anthony Robbins

IT’S TIME TO DO WHAT YOU LOVE!

Does this question sound familiar, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I’m sure you were asked this question dozens of times during your youth. What was your response?  When asked the question, without hesitation I would exclaim “I want to be a teacher!”

At 8 years old, I enjoyed tutoring and instructing my siblings who were 7, 6 and 5 years of age.  I digress for a moment as I recall the looks and comments I have received over the years, when I share the ages of me and my siblings.  We are stair steps—literally, 10-12 months apart.  All I can say is that my parents were excited about creating a family :).  So now, back to my story.

Playing teacher with my siblings was so exciting and rewarding.  Watching their little faces light up when they answered a question correctly or came to understand a concept that once challenged them, gave me so much joy.  I felt that I was making a difference.  I remember tutoring students in math and rejoicing with them when they grasped and/or solved a math problem that they once thought was beyond their comprehension.  For me, being a teacher was my calling.

We all had dreams of becoming something great.  For you it may have been a teacher, fireman, lawyer, chef, journalist, veterinarian or a rock star, just to name a few. Well, how did you do? What are you doing now?  Are you doing what you love?  As we grow older, life becomes busier and things change.  Jobs, marriages, children and businesses have a way of getting us off track.  However, at some point we must get back on the path that will lead us to true fulfillment.  Doing what you love brings true fulfillment. Are you aspiring to realize the dreams from your youth?

Earlier, I shared with you that at 8 years old I was convinced that I wanted to be a teacher.  I truly believed it was my “calling.”  However, during a career fair in high school I became disappointed by the salary ranges for a teacher and decided to pursue business.  I have spent the past 25 years in the business sector; and guess what…I AM A TEACHER!  As a speaker, trainer and coach I am blessed to share information that motivates and inspires individuals to aspire to greatness.  At the end of the day, this is called “teaching”.  I am grateful to God, that on a daily basis I am able to “teach” in some form.  Thank God for the inventions of “blogging” and social media, because it has enabled me to widen my classroom.

As some of you may know, I have been fighting a bacterial infection over the past five weeks.  During the past 5 weeks, I have lost my voice twice for a period of 3-4 days.  For two weeks, I was confined to bed and completely drained of my energy.  Although I was sick, I was appreciative for the gift.  The gift to be still, quiet and reflective.  As I was convalescing, I had quite a bit of time to think about my life and realized that I’m truly doing what I love…I am living my passion.  What I realized is that it’s time to take things to the next level.  Going to the next level will require me to make some bold and life changing decisions, but I’m ready.  So, I am excited about the next chapter of my life. Let me ask you, “What will the next chapter of your life entail?”  Will it include you finally doing the things that you love?

While no job or business is perfect, the important thing is to enjoy it and learn from it. If you are unhappy in your current situation, take steps NOW to change it!  You only live once. Somewhere out there is a job or business that is perfect for you. If you are already there, I applaud you. If not, realize that it may take some time to figure out what you really want to do, and even more time to actually get there. That’s all right! Just make a decision and begin the journey.  I can tell you from experience that finding and doing what you love is absolutely worth it, every step of the way.  I am pursuing my purpose with passion; and there’s no greater feeling!

Do what you love, and love what you do, whatever that may be. You’ll be happier for it, trust me. It’s the only way to truly ASPIRE TO GREATNESS!

“When someone behaves in a way that is disagreeable to you, before you jump to the wrong conclusion, ask yourself, ‘What else could it mean?’” How many times have you been guilty of jumping to the wrong conclusion because you did not clearly examine all the facts? But rather, you accepted the first answer your mind provided. Here’s a side note, we must remember that the way we process and filter information is based upon our own experiences and view of the world. So, what does this mean? Our view is distorted. Therefore, it’s important to obtain pertinent information before reaching a conclusion.

As human beings, nearly all of us have a tendency to want to be right. Consequently, we will examine a situation; reach a conclusion; and then accept it as truth without considering all the facts. Clearly, reviewing the facts about a situation can help shed some light on our “perceived” truth.

On many occasions, we have been guilty of accepting the surface answers we give ourselves without testing the answer for accuracy. This thinking can be especially destructive within relationships. If we are engaging in a cycle of jumping to conclusions, rather than getting to the truth or “heart” of the matter, we will build relationships based on lies. Can you envision how this could erode relationships over time?

It’s important to understand, that each of us have a different belief system, consequently we see, hear, filter and process information differently. Additionally, we each have different biases and prejudices based on our experiences. To help you develop the discipline of asking yourself, “What else could it mean?” please consider the following:

1.  Engage in active listening

Listen with the intent to understand and hear; not to offer your opinion or rebuttal. Active listening requires that you repeat back or paraphrase to the individual what you heard them say. This technique helps to improve communication as it conveys to the person that you were listening and that you care about what they have to say. Furthermore, the individual is assured that the message was received as it was intended.

2.  Gather additional information

Do you remember the saying, “There’s more to this than meets the eye.” Oftentimes, there is much more going on in a situation than what is being communicated or what can be assessed on the surface. Consequently, before reaching a conclusion, we must act responsibly in gathering and reviewing as much information as possible before drawing a conclusion and/or making a decision.

3.  Conclude objectively

Leave your personal feelings, biases and prejudices out of the equation. Now, this can be easier said than done. However, one can exercise objectivity with practice. The more you focus on the facts, the easier it will be for you to be objective.

Let me give you two examples of how easy it can be for us to jump to the wrong conclusions, because we do not take out the time to ask ourselves, “What else could it mean?”

1. Your female manager is often cantankerous and belligerent. She rarely socializes with members of her team or upper management in and outside of work. The conclusion drawn is that she’s mean, unfriendly and does not know how to effectively interact with or manage people. Have you asked yourself, “What else could it mean?” Well, after repeated complaints, her manager sits down with her and learns that she has been in a physically abusive marriage for 5 years. She has been unaware of how her pain and fear is being manifested at work. Because she is unable to beat on him, she beats on other people with her attitude and words.

2.  A husband has been despondent for the past 3 months. Whenever his wife asks him what’s wrong, he responds, “I’m fine. It’s nothing you have done. I am just dealing with some issues at work.” The wife concludes that her husband no longer loves her and has lost interest in her. “Maybe he’s having an affair,” she says. Have you asked yourself “What else could it mean?” Maybe it means that 4 months ago he began experiencing sharp pains in his head and dismissed them as headaches due to work related stress. Well, while at work one day the pain was so bad, his manager suggested that he go to the emergency room. After several tests and x-rays the doctors concluded that he has an advanced stage of brain cancer with 6-9 months to live. He has been struggling with dying and how to tell his wife and kids. Furthermore, his life insurance policy has lapsed and due to his pre-existing condition, he is unable to obtain a new policy.

From these two examples, can you see how easy it is for us to jump to the wrong conclusion? ASPIRE TO GREATNESS is about living, doing, being and thinking on a higher level. To walk in our greatness, we must better manage our relationships and exercise responsibility in asking ourselves, “What else could it mean?”

Thank you for reading this article.  Please feel free to leave a comment.  I would love to know your thoughts.  Remember, sharing is caring .

Have a FANSPIRING day!

Always Aspiring,
Rosalynd

ASPIRING IS A JOURNEY

ASPIRE TO GREATNESS IS A MINDSET!

Throughout my lifetime, I never recall hearing the term “aspire to greatness,” with respect to what I could be or achieve as a person.  I recall using this term for the first time, in February 1999 when I wrote the Director of Continuing Education at Hudson County Community College a “Thank You Letter” for affording me the opportunity to inspire the students to “aspire to greatness” through the professional development training programs I was facilitating.  Who knew, what would be birthed 13 years later.

Whenever I observed the word “greatness” being used to describe a person, it was typically associated with famous actors and actresses, the wealthy, a famous doctor who discovered a cure or world-renowned artists and authors, just to name a few. This has left many of us feeling that unless we accomplished something noteworthy, or bore a last name like “Kennedy,” “Rockefeller,” “Hilton,” or “Obama,”  that greatness was out of reach. Well, I’m about to make your day…your year…hopefully, completely change your life. I want to give you another perspective on what it means to “ASPIRE TO GREATNESS.”

So, what does “ASPIRE TO GREATNESS” mean to me? Well, first I need to share with you an awesome book called, “The Science of Being Great,” (please download from the FREE Resources section) written by Wallace D. Wattles. Mr. Wattles was known as one of the fathers of the self-improvement movement. He was born in the USA shortly after the civil war, and experienced much failure in his earlier years. Later in life he became a student of various religious beliefs and philosophies of the world including those of Descartes, Spinoza, Leibnitz, Schopenhauer, Hegel, Swedenborg, Emerson, and others. It was through his research, committed study and experimentation that he discovered the truth of New Thought principles and put them into practice in his own life. He began to write books outlining these principles. In his life changing book, “The Science of Being Great,” he said,

“Nothing was ever in any man that is not in you; no man ever had more spiritual or mental power than you can attain, or did greater things than you can accomplish. You can become what you want to be.”

In that moment, I experienced a paradigm shift.  What I had believed and had known all of my life, took on a different shape and meaning.  It was more than an epiphany, it was a spiritual awakening; and it could not have come at a better time. Let me explain.

While reading this book, I was going through what I call my “greatest Tsunami–to date.” It is important to note that I completely understand that I was simply going through a “transition” and this “experience” was a part of my process.  What I affectionately termed my Tsunami, was preparation for fully embracing and walking out my purpose. Now, back to the story…during this phase of transition, I was experiencing an identity crisis (I will discuss in further detail in a future post as I believe this is an epidemic that many are facing today). Everyday, for a long season, I asked myself: “Who am I, really?“,” Why I am here?”, “Will I ever become great?” “Do I still have it?” You see for me, I defined great as how much money I had, my title, my home, my address, becoming a multi-millionaire, becoming a world-renowned motivational speaker, empowerment coach and trainer. Oh, boy, did I miss it. In fact, I missed it big time! True greatness is not measured in mere accomplishments of one’s goal or acquiring worldly status symbols, true greatness is a mindset. It’s a way of being, a way of thinking. In its simplest form is about doing everything in a great way.

Let me further expand on what I believe it means to “ASPIRE TO GREATNESS.”  To me, it means:

1. walking in a spirit of excellence
2. being a person of great integrity and character
3. exercising moral and social responsibility
4. awakening to your true self
5. being authentic
6. being self-aware
7. living life “consciously”
8. showing up for those that need and depend upon you, regardless of how you feel and what is and isn’t happening in your life
9. being a servant
10. being your brother and sister’s keeper in actions, not just in words
11. being true to who you are without compromise
12. intentionally and proactively becoming the change you want to see in the world

For the individual that lives to “ASPIRE TO GREATNESS,” every day they awake with a mindset that says:

1. Mediocrity is not an option.
2. I will make a difference in the world.
3. I am pursuing my purpose with passion.
4. I will become the change I want to see in the world.
5. I will treat people as I want to be treated and not how they treat me.
6. The vision for my life will be manifested.
7. Today, I am going to be the best person I can be.
8. I understand that my life doesn’t belong to me.  Therefore, I will show up in the life of everyone who needs me today; regardless of how I feel.
9. I will live, do and be on a higher level.

The quote below has become my mantra, my belief.  I pray you will embrace this quote as your inward belief, which will change your outward expression of how you LIVE, DO and BE.

“Inherent in every human being is the ability to become great…this means you!”

YES…YOU ARE GREAT!  Regardless of your past, life experiences and where you currently find yourself.  YOUR PAST DOESN’T HAVE THE POWER TO DEFINE YOU…ONLY YOU DO!  Wallace D. Wattles said,

“Man’s brain, body, mind, faculties, and talents are the mere instruments he uses in demonstrating greatness; in themselves they do not make him great. A man may have a large brain and a good mind, strong faculties, and brilliant talents, and yet he is not a great man unless he uses all these in a great way.”

I concur! How about you? Beginning today, use everything you have at your disposable in a great way!

Here are 5 few simple things you can do today to walk in your greatness:

1. Make a decision. Everything begins and ends with a decision.  Decide that today you will “ASPIRE TO GREATNESS!”
2. Embrace Who You Really Are.  We are all spiritual beings having  a human experience.  Every spiritual being possesses greatness within him, which he/she can tap into at any moment.
3. Read “The Science of Being Great.” If you have not done so already, download and commit to reading this book within the next 3 days.  The book will serve as a great companion and teacher on your journey.
4. Subscribe to the Blog. Every journey will require motivation, inspiration, encouragement and energy to stay the course.
5. Share.  There is power in sharing.  Do not underestimate the power of your words and your decree.  Your words could very well be what another member in our aspiring community needs to hear to help them on their journey.  So, in the comments box below, please share what you will commit to doing over the next 24 hours to start you on your journey to “ASPIRE TO GREATNESS!”  Pick any area of your life and making a commitment within the next 24 hours to do something to put you on that path.  What will you do over the next 30 days to create the life you want and deserve?

I wish you much success on your journey.  Remember, you are not alone; you have an aspiring community behind you.

Have a FANSPIRING day my friend!

Always Aspiring,

Rosalynd

Your Sister and Friend

Dear Friends:

This morning my heart is heavy, as I contemplate the future of a young 13-year girl I met a few days ago and her one month old baby. In a few hours, she will be boarding a plane to join her father in Florida. While looking into her eyes, I told her how special she is and that her baby is a gift. I reminded her that she is not her mistakes and to not blame herself for the decisions she has made; but to learn the lessons and move forward. I shared with her the challenges and rewards she would experience as a mother.

Furthermore, we talked about the importance of her valuing and honoring herself and her body; and that she is a gift to any man lucky enough to have her. We talked about the importance of dealing with her pain; becoming emotionally and spiritually healthy and her priorities as a mother.  Additionally, I stressed the importance of her finding a support group that can help nurture her along her journey and provide emotional support. Immediately, my heart began to cry out as I thought about the reality of what I asked her to obtain for herself. Who can she really count on? Who will mentor and guide her? Who’s going to step up in this young girl’s life, and be there for her and her baby? Who will remind her of how special she is and cultivate the greatness that resides within her?  I am trusting God to open a few doors for her in Florida. What burdens me is the millions of young girls that require the same level of support.

As I held her and assured her that everything would be alright, I could feel her pain. When I asked her if she was afraid, she began to cry. I said to her that I knew that she wish it was her mother holding her and not a stranger.  In that moment, I was very aware and conscious of how the power of her mother’s love and affirming words could instantly empower her. This young woman is in desperate need of intentional parenting, her parent’s love and a community of people that will uphold her.  I wonder how many people have stopped to ask themselves, “How does this young girl really feel?” I can tell you how you feels, she’s scared to death, she feels alone and does not feel equipped to meet the demands that come with caring for a newborn.  She herself is still a baby.

As a society, we must change our perception of teenage moms. Many of these young women are hurting as a result of broken homes, absent fathers, no one to confide in, low self-esteem, mistaken identity, mother’s that are overworked and have checked out…and the list goes on.  Teenage moms should not be discarded and labeled as promiscuous young girls who are contagious or have some sort of disease.  The reality is that teenage pregnancy exists because of what’s lacking in their home and society at large.  THERE’S A MUCH LARGER ISSUE THAT MUST BE ADDRESSED.  For many, it’s easier to blame the young girls and label them as promiscuous, than it is to stop and ask, “How have I and society contributed to this epidemic?”

Along my journey, I have discovered that many of us need to ASPIRE to compassion. The world is lacking in this area. Consequently, many of us suffer through life needlessly.

What would the world look like if we exercised more compassion?

How healthy would you be, if someone had taken out the time to walk you through
a challenging time, without judgment and harsh criticism?

Before we parted, I had her store my number in her phone; and I did the same. I have made a commitment to stay connected to this young lady and be a source of courage, compassion and connection.  I will be a lifeline for her.

How can you make a difference today in the life of someone that is in need?

Who in your circle is in need of compassion?

Today it’s them, tomorrow it could be you. 

Please join me in praying for the success of this young lady and her beautiful baby.

Today, I affirm that I will…

ASPIRE TO GREATNESS AND BE A SOURCE OF COURAGE, COMPASSION,
EMPATHY AND CONNECTION TO EVERY SOUL YOU MEET!

What energy sources do you plug into to ensure you are functioning properly and living a life of purpose?

An incandescent light bulb’s sole purpose is to bring illumination. It has the ability to lighten up a dark room and further brighten a lit room. The only way the bulb can achieve its purpose, is to be plugged into an energy source – a functioning electrical outlet. When an electrical current passes through the wire, it causes the wire to heat. The wire, or filament, gets so hot that it glows and gives off light. Unless the light bulb is plugged into an outlet, it will cease to function. If it is plugged into a faulty outlet, it will function improperly. Meaning, it may illuminate, but not to the extent for which it was designed.

Some of you may feel that you are not “functioning” properly. In some cases, you may feel as if you’re malfunctioning. Like the light bulb, to function properly, you must get plugged into positive energy sources!

For each person, these positive energy sources will differ. However, I believe for people aspiring to live a life of greatness, there are some key things you must plug into. Here are four things to consider:

I. Spiritual Development
We are “spiritual” beings having a “human” experience. Yet, many of us spend more time developing our outer man as opposed to our inner man. Many describe the “spirit” man as being everything about us that is non-physical; such as our thoughts, beliefs, mind, imaginations, intellect, creativity, plans, hopes, dreams, emotions, personality and attitudes. All of these components are what makes each of us the unique and great beings that we are. Hence, spiritual development is vital to ones growth as it helps to increase your awareness and consciousness; awaken you to your true identity and purpose; and helps you to understand that we are all connected.

To develop my spirit man, I have a daily regimen of worship, prayer, meditation and reading various types of literature. What are some of the things you do on a daily basis to develop spiritually? Becoming spiritually attuned will help you to live a life of purpose on purpose.

II. Affirmations
An affirmation is a clear and definitive statement that something is so; a declaration. What declarations are you making in your life on a daily basis? Are the majority of them positive or negative? Are most of them spoken unconsciously or consciously? Your affirmations are declarations of what you want to have, do and become in your life. What you have in your life, is a result of what you have affirmed.

Do you have a list of positive affirmations to create the life you desire? If “yes,” are they posted where you can see them? Do you read them aloud a minimum of twice a day? If “no,” please make a commitment to develop a list of at least 15 affirmations within the next 24 hours. Words are energy; words are power. Remember, you have what you say. Whatever you affirm over and over becomes your reality. It’s time that you become intentional about the life you want to create and experience.

In the spirit of sharing, here are five of the 27 affirmations I recite daily:

1. I am a genius and use my mind, talents, gifts and abilities to produce wealth.
2. I am living a life of divine purpose and destiny.
3. I am in control of my mind; my mind serves me.
4. I am the host of a talk show and radio program that aspires individuals to live a life of greatness.
5. I am a powerful Life Coach, partnering with people to help them live their best life now!

III. A Community of Like-Minded Individuals
It’s been said that it takes a village to raise a child; which I believe to be true. In the same way, it can be said that it takes a village to birth a vision;  realize a dream; inspire one to dream and think big; to provide the accountability and support necessary to achieve success. There’s nothing more powerful, than being plugged into a community of like-minded individuals that think the way you do and push you beyond your comfort zone to accomplish things you never dreamed possible.  As they say, “iron sharpens iron.” What an incredible energy source! Who’s sharpening you? Do you belong to a community of like-minded individuals? If not, find one and get plugged in.

IV. Vision Board
Your vision board is one of the most powerful energy sources you could ever own and plug into; as it is a visual representation of every dream, desire and goal you want to manifest in your life. I refer to my vision board as my “future reality.” Everyday, I affirm that my vision WILL come to pass.

With so many competing priorities in our lives, it can be challenging to stay focused on your vision; not to mention the energy and focus that is needed to make it happen. Can you imagine the energy you receive and send out by plugging into a source that visually conveys what you want to have, do and be in your life…every single day. For this reason, my vision board hangs above my bed. My vision for my life is the first thing I see when I awake; and it’s the last image I see before drifting off to sleep. Do you have a vision board? If not, today is a great day to create one. Your vision board is a vital key to your success.

Just like the light bulb was created to shine, so are you. But first, you must get plugged in!

ASPIRE TO GREATNESS MY FRIEND!

Always Aspiring,
Rosalynd
Your Sister and Friend

CALLING ALL LADIES!

Have you identified your core values?

Is your life and core values in alignment?

Are you “consciously” living “your” core values?

“When you achieve complete congruence between your values and your goals, like a hand in a glove, you feel strong, happy, healthy, and fully integrated as a person. You develop a kind of courage that makes you completely unafraid to make decisions and take action. Your whole life improves when you begin living your life by the values that you most admire.”~Brian Tracy

To truly live a life of fulfillment, harmony, meaning, satisfaction and greatness, one must be true to themselves by honoring their core values. Have you identified your core values? Are you living a life aligned with your values?

Your values are your guiding principles, the things that mean the most to you. Like a compass, your values dictate the choices you make and determines your life’s direction. 

Your core values must be the driving force in your life.  We all have and live by values, the question is: “Are you consciously living core values “you” have chosen to help you live your best life now? Many people are not consciously aware that they are living values inherited from their parents and/or have adopted values based on societal influences, that are NOT serving them.  It’s time to live your life on purpose.

Please join me and my co-host Sandra Haynes Sawyer as we discuss the importance of identifying and consciously living your core values, on Saturday, May 18 from 10:00 AM -10:30 AM EST.

We look forward to you tuning in, “For Such A Time As This!”

Have a FANSPIRING day!

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/ladies-for-such-a-time-as-this/2013/05/18/are-you-living-your-core-values

“All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake up in the day to find it was vanity, but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible.” ~ T.E. Lawrence

Like many of you, in my childhood I dreamed many dreams.  Many of them were extraordinary and seemed impossible.  The more my imagination grew, the bigger my dreams grew.  As children, we had an amazing ability to look fear in the face and laugh at it.  In fact, we dared fear to give us a run for our money.  However, somewhere along the journey of dreaming big, LIFE HAPPENED! 

When life happens, we don’t dream as big.  The gap between the impossible and possible grows wider and wider.  For those of you who have stopped dreaming altogether, I have a message for you.  “You must dream, because if you don’t, you’ll die.”  Not physically, but in every other way, you will cease to exist.  Yes, I know to ask you to dream again or to dream big may be a scary proposition. You have dreamed many dreams and after 5, 10, 15 years they haven’t come true.  Perhaps you have stopped dreaming because you’ve completely given up hope that your dreams will ever come true.  Well today, I would like to offer you one word of hope, “COURAGE.”   I pray that today you will summon the courage to dream again.  Remember this, as long as you are still alive there is still time to realize your dreams.

I am happy to share with you that I have started dreaming big dreams.  The older I get, the more I understand that my life doesn’t belong to me, but to the people whom I’ve been called to serve.  Furthermore, most of my dreams involve other people.  My dreams continue to serve as insight into my purpose and brings clarity to the vision that God has given me.  Hence, I can never stop dreaming and neither can you.  For your dreams don’t just benefit you, but they affect the lives of others.

To help you on your journey,  I would like to share this powerful 3-minute video called “Dreams Are Whispers From the Soul.”  Many of your dreams are related to your purpose; the main reason for your existence.  Because of this, your soul will never stop dreaming.

Summon the courage to dream again my friend and ASPIRE TO GREATNESS!

On the eve of my 45th birthday, February 26, I could hear Oprah Winfrey’s infamous question playing over and over again in my mind, “What do you know for sure?” Over the past couple of years, I have observed her ask this question of many guests as they share stories and pass on their wisdom. It’s March 11, and this question has been playing as a loop in my mind.

As I envision myself sitting across from Oprah, we are engaged in stimulating conversation regarding our life experiences and lessons learned. Our time together is drawing to a close, and she smiles and asks me, “Rosalynd, what do you know for sure?” I share the following thoughts:

1. Being a Great Mother Is My Greatest Role

About a year ago, a colleague I worked with many years ago applauded me on Facebook for being a great mother to my now 28-year old daughter. Although, I appreciated her comment, I responded “No, I wasn’t a great mother, I was a good mother and here’s why…” I am sure that many people reading my comment were thinking to themselves, “What is going on with her and why is she admitting this publicly?” Well, let me first share something with you about me. I believe in the power of transparency. In this world today, I believe many of the epidemics we face are because most people don’t have the courage to stand up and just be real. I wonder what the state of our marriages, relationships, companies, communities and churches would look life if we exercised great courage…just something to ponder.

As a single mother raising my daughter, I struggled with the stigma of being a teen mother.  I harbored feelings of guilt because my daughter’s father was not actively involved in her life; and the list goes on and on. Consequently, I developed a mindset and value system of acquiring and attaining. I truly believed that if I provided my daughter with every material thing; sent her to the best schools; filled her life with great activities; purchased a home and excelled as a professional and entrepreneur, then I would become a great mother. WRONG…WRONG…WRONG! Providing your child with things doesn’t make you a great mother. Ask your adult child…ask yourself what your experiences were growing up.

What I know for sure about being a great mother is this, you must:

a. tell your child every day that you love them and how special they are.

b. be emotionally available.

c. be actively present when they show up.

d. teach them morals and values.

e. exercise great responsibility in what you allow them to hear and view. Everything they are exposed to will develop their personality and belief system (by the age of 7), which will determine who and what they become.

f. allow them to be themselves and not what you want them to be.

g. nurture the gifts, talents and abilities ALREADY within them. Each person was born unique, for a specific purpose. Help your child discover who THEY are, not what you want them to become.

h. be impeccable with your words. Whatever you tell your child about who they are, they will believe and become it. Your words hold the key to shaping your child’s destiny.

i. love your child unconditionally for who they are and where they are.

j. love, protect and nurture your child, no matter what.

My beautiful 4-year old Gabriella is very independent, verbal, opinionated and energetic. Most times, she is a handful. But you know what, I love and appreciate her for who she is. I am not seeking to change her, but to develop and cultivate the awesome gifts, talents and abilities God has given her.

I believe that every human begin was created for a specific purpose. I believe we were all created to solve a specific problem; to be the answer for someone or something. What I know for sure is that Gabriella was created for purpose and that she is my gift. How Gabriella serves and shows up in the world will be an indication of the mother I am to her. Because she is the solution to a problem, my greatest role will be in how I love, nurture, protect, guide and serve her.  This is what I know for sure.

2. The Only Person You Have the Power to Change is Yourself

Like many of you, for many years I held the belief that I actually had the power to change the people I loved the most; such as my husband, children, parents and siblings. Although, I have heard all my life, “You can’t change anyone but yourself,” I believed there was an exception to the rule that other people had not yet figured out. In most cases, I believed that if someone really loved me and wanted to make me happy, they would change their negative behaviors and attitudes. I was so wrong. While change is very necessary, it can be difficult.

What I know for sure is that no one has the power to change another, nor should they seek to do so. People will only change if they believe they need to change, coupled with a strong desire to do so. If people do not see the need to change, there is nothing you can do to bring about change in their lives. Change is a personal decision.

At best, we have the power to influence one to change their actions, behavior, attitude or opinion; which is quite different. As human beings, we constantly seek to change another, when we should be consumed with changing ourselves. Like Gandhi, I believe that we must aspire to become the change we want to see in the world…and so, change begins with you.

These are the things I know for sure. When you know better, you do better. I am now inspired to ASPIRE TO GREATNESS in these areas of my life. Will you join me?

If you enjoyed this post, please be sure to subscribe to the blog as this will be a continued series.

Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by. I hope you were inspired to ASPIRE TO GREATNESS!

Always Aspiring,

Rosalynd

“Greatness of mind is not dependent upon one’s title, class or stature, but rather one’s ability to extend grace, love and compassion to another in the midst of adversity.” ~ Rosalynd M. Rambert

Just sharing…

Today, I find myself challenged as I contemplate the state of several personal relationships.   The more aware I become, and the more committed I become to “becoming the change I want to see in the world,” the phrase “relationships take work,” have taken on a completely new meaning.

As I navigate the complex waters of relationships, I have come to realize that many people don’t have a consciousness of what it takes to nurture, maintain and manage a healthy relationship.  Personally, I believe two of the main challenges we face is our “definition” and “expectations” of the relationship.  How have you “defined” the relationship you are in?  Does the person hold the same definition? What are your expectations for the relationship and the individual?  What have you committed to contributing to the relationship?  Are you proactively nurturing and managing the relationship in a healthy way?  Does the person place the same value on the relationship that you do?

Many of us suffer needlessly in relationships because our expectations of what that relationship can offer and produce are unrealistic.  To be fair, sometimes it’s hard to ascertain just how realistic our expectations are until the relationship hits a bump in the road–often disguised as conflict.  In most instances, I don’t believe you really know what’s in a person or what they are capable of until adversity strikes. Specifically, what do I mean?  Well, here’s a list of a few things to consider, some of which might be up close and personal for you.

How do you react and manage the person, when…

1. they hold a differing opinion and/or perspective about something you believe in strongly?
2. their belief system prevents them from being open to your way of thinking?
3. they said something to hurt your feelings or assassinate your character?
4. you feel that their comments toward you were dismissive and devaluing?
5. they don’t place the same value on the relationship that you do?
6. they have caused you great pain in areas where you had to trust God for healing?
7. you feel they have completely misunderstood and ignored you in your greatest hour of need?
8. they cut you off, for reasons that are unknown to you?

Be honest!  How do you really feel about this?  How does it affect you?  What crazy thoughts and ideas run through your mind?

Well, since I’m being transparent.  I’ll be really honest.  Sometimes it really hurts.  Sometimes it leaves me feeling as if there is something wrong with me.   Sometimes I say to myself, “Why should I continue to be so loving and helpful when most people don’t care.”  In this moment, it’s important to note that this is your ego talking.  The ego is easily offended–this is another subject entirely, which we’ll discuss at another time.  The ego wants to be loved; it wants to be comforted; it wants to be validated; it wants to feel important; IT WANTS TO BE RIGHT!  We can stay on this latter point for days…you know what I mean .

As a human being, these feelings and tendencies are natural.  However, we must remember that we are spirit beings having a human experience; and we can tap into our higher self at any moment.  As spirit beings, we have the ability to transcend to a state of consciousness and intelligence that allows us to view the situation from other realm.

 On my journey of aspiring to greatness, I have and am still learning:

1. to give up the right to understand why people do what they do
2. to accept them for who they are and where they are
3. to be grateful for the experience and ask myself, “What am I to learn from this situation?”
4. to appreciate the experience; discover and embrace the lesson
5. to hold no malice and forgive quickly
6. to wish the individual well and pray for them
7. that most times it’s not about right or wrong, but perspective
8. because of our experiences and belief systems, we process and filter information differently
9. we all have blind spots; no one sees everything
10. to extend grace, love and compassion in the most challenging situations

More importantly, I am learning to take responsibility for everything I experience in my relationships.  After all, either I invited the person in my life and/or I taught them in some way how to treat me.  Now, this statement may be hard to swallow, but one worth digesting and pondering.

LESSON LEARNED:

“When people show you who they really are, believe them?”  With this realization comes responsibility.  You now have to change your expectations and manage the relationship accordingly.  I must share one caveat to this quote.  Just as you are in your season of change and growth, so is this individual.  Hence, be careful about closing doors.  We are all guilty of having shown up as “not our best self.”  Just as people extended us grace, so we must do the same.  So, we must learn to accept and manage people based on where they are and not be so quick to throw people away.

As I ASPIRE TO GREATNESS, I am learning that “becoming the change you want to see in this world” is not easy.  But, I believe it can be done and I believe it’s necessary for so many reasons.  At the end of the day, we are all a work in progress.  No one ever arrives; for it takes daily commitment and the power of intention to reprogram our subconscious mind and create new belief systems that will ensure success in every area of our lives.  I continue to pray that we will LIVE…DO…BE on a higher level; beginning with me.

Please share your thoughts and feelings in the comment box below.  Sharing is powerful!  If you have not done so already, please be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss one ASPIRING post .

ASPIRE TO GREATNESS MY FRIENDS!